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Controlling anger in confrontations
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  4. The Letters of Abigail and John Adams Show Their Mutual Respect

We all get groped on the subway. How is this a surprise to you? My eyes are open. I had no idea how frequent this was. I had no idea how common this was! And then this summer and fall during Christine Blasey-Ford, when you had a whole new batch of women, many of them in that case actually older women, talking about-. Again, of course, it happened to everybody.

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We have now talked about this three times! How can you That desire, which is natural and human-. If you were a member of a class and a population-. And that was the story of the 80s and the 90s, and then, of course, it sort of hit a symbolically Racism was a stage through which this country has successfully passed. We have elected a black president.

She might as well have been the president. So you had Occupy Wall Street, which was a furious demonstration in response to economic inequality. Black Lives Matter. And that movement becomes incredibly important to shaping our politics. I mean, one of the myths about the civil rights movement is that it had wide public support and that, you know, no. It was, a minority of Americans were supportive of the Civil Rights movement. This is our industries, our businesses, our national pastimes.

We can acknowledge Rosa Parks and Mamie Till as catalytic figures in the Civil Rights movement, but we never talk about their anger. Rosa Parks is brought to us as an extremely tired, saintly-. She was an investigator for the NAACP who investigated the gang rapes of black women by white men in the Jim Crow South, and investigated often false claims of sexual violence made by white women against black men.

Therapists in Adams County, PA

Oh, someone the other day called me I have to remember. It was one of those, hysterical. But go ahead.

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Is that in the story of the founding-. Then built a country. So where are we now? You have all these various I always say they kiss up and kick down to stop the anger from coming up. What I was referring to before is, when the less powerful challenge the ascension or further accrual of power, this is a The Kavanaugh thing was a perfect example of this, right?

In fact, the thing that was being threatened was that Brett Kavanaugh might not be appointed to the most powerful Nothing criminal. And the objection to his further accrual of power based on credible accusations that he had abused his power physically and sexually in his past, that was recast by the most powerful in the situation, the president, the party that was invested in his further accrual of power, as an attack on him. And I write in the book about the first time that I saw that pattern happen, and once you see it, you cannot unsee it. Was, I noticed in when Freddie Gray was killed by police in Baltimore.

He was taken on a rough ride and died of his injuries, and then there were protests in response to his death. And the way the media covered it I saw it everywhere. The women who are yelling at the capital, the women who are so angry that they are protesting, women and men, their yelling is the only power available to them. This man has just been confirmed to the Supreme Court. The only power they have is to hold a sign and to yell through the vote.

And so they are powerless in the situation, but they are cast as the aggressive mob, which is the same thing that happened during MeToo. Not even close. Worse timing. Good job! So, MeToo. Stay angry. Do not stop. Well, the anger propels people into doing all kinds of things. MeToo is one of the expressions of the anger. Another is the historic number of women, and especially women of color, running for office.

You have women whose anger at all of this has prompted them to support some of the women running for office. The teacher strikers of last spring. There are a million ways in which the moment at which you stop looking away from the things that will make you enraged and you start actually permitting yourself to feel the rage drives people to do something about that rage. So Lowell, another point. Yes, the Atlanta washerwomen strike in , which was primarily black women who were washerwomen in very tortured working conditions, making soap and things in a hot Atlanta, struck.

So anger, anger, anger, anger. Like, here you have MeToo and people get exhausted. They get just absolutely exhausted by You know that feeling, right?

Yes, exactly. Yes, yes. And that, to me, is the stuff Trump does. I mean, because I do. Well, I want to know historical. What happens historically when What happens to-. And of course, the activism had extended before , too. Those were the two. You know, the Abolition and Suffrage Movement, in the s, the Suffrage Movement begins to take root out of women who are involved in the Abolition Movement.

This is -. The truth is, we feel exhausted after a couple of years. But in fact, we look back at generations of people whose anger drove them through their lives. And in fact, many generations of people who died before they saw any fruits of their energies or labors. But, the fact that they gave their lives to those efforts, in fact, led to the forward motion that we then made the mistake of taking for granted. So how do you look at the current state of affairs around Me, I believe this is all motivated by a lot of the same thing, which is the anger of the underrepresented, the anger of the subjugated.

And the tax.

Book Excerpt: Good and Mad, by Rebecca Traister

Taxation without representation, right? And so, the one thing that has to happen, and I think we have to come to grips with it, is that there is tremendous backlash. And their anger is potent in this moment, too. And those are the voices -.

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  • They drive me We had such fascinating discussions around Kavanaugh and what saved it was my son, who would not put up with it which was -. You know, it was interesting. Like, all the time. There was nowhere for her to go, and it was great. I was like literally, parenting finished, done.

    The Letters of Abigail and John Adams Show Their Mutual Respect

    That kind of thing. Or think that they deserve it. And the whiteness comes into this because white women benefit from white supremacy, both themselves individually, and that cuts them off from the experiences of and alliances with women who do not benefit from white supremacy, women who are not white. This is a major dynamic going forward. And as the anger, the progressive coalition, driven in part by the anger of women, some of whom have been angry their whole lives and some of who are newly angry, is going to be met with what was already in place, which was the punitive anger of a power structure challenge.

    This is what mass shooters have been operating from some of this violence for a long time. That has already been, for a long time, the motivation of so much violence in this country, this fury at the disruptions in power that mean that certain kinds of people who historically have felt that they have a certain entitlement to power no longer feel like they have that same I think the waking up of that group of people.

    Essentially you have to have had things done upon you to understand it, right? I remember that. I went through the period when it was very dangerous, and so I have some sense of not getting, you know what I mean?

    And the idea that for some people in power, that former thing, that again the injustice of having a massive promotion in power, the further accrual of power halted or questioned could be viewed as a kind of mob act of aggression. And it will be a forever clash, right? And in terms of And the thing that we have to come to grips with now, and I find this especially as there has been talk lead up to the midterms and the midterms Whatever happens in the midterms, whatever happens in , this is not fixed with an election.